Ancient Horror History Unearthed: Grimm Memorials by R. Patrick Gates REVIEWED

Grimm Memorials!!!

Holy WOAHHHHH!

What a great book. This may be the last one I get to read and review in 2017, and as such, I couldn't be happier to close the year out with such a stellar choice.

Grimm Memorials was put on my radar by several of my online friends at the Facebook group, Books of Horror, who generally have never steered me wrong. They certainly haven't here either, as this is pretty much everything I am looking for in a read.

R. Patrick Gates' second and arguably most well-known novel, a cult-classic of sorts that delivers all it promises in spades, is just perfect reading for a guy like me.

I was a huge fan of his first book, Fear, which I reviewed here on Halloween. Now, on Christmas Eve, I review this...which takes all of the things I enjoyed about that book and turns it up to 11 by refining every quality Gates seems to carry, mastering it and throwing it in the reader's face.

This is the literature equivalent of abrasive punk rock, taking a fairly basic premise, then adding heaps of hallucinatory moments, relentlessly vicious gore, supernatural villains and true human horror for a final product that ends up being one of my favorite books ever.

That's right, Grimm Memorials is one of the most enjoyable books I have ever read. It places Gates' in "favorite author" status for me, as I enjoyed Fear equally.

I recall reading Fear and being blown away by it's approach, reading like a carnival dark ride run by maniacs, with outlandish set piece after outlandish set piece bombarding the reader, just an incredibly fun, messed-up book for Horror Fiction fans to love. In my review, I said that Gates writes 'feral reading' in presentation...

He masters that here. Those feral moments are still present, just managed in a more linear way. I wouldn't say Grimm Memorials is subdued reading by any stretch of the imagination, of course. It's just more linear and timed in its sequences of viciousness than Fear.

Grimm Memorials takes the same approach, blasting the audience with even more disgusting and unnerving moments but adds much more in the way of engaging narrative. Pacing is perfect for the almost-450 page book...and that's something you'll be hard pressed to hear me ever say again. My feeling is generally that the horror novel sweet-spot is around 300 pages, the equivalent to 90 minutes in film. You get in, you tell your story, you get out.

But Gates' just does those extended set pieces so perfectly that you don't even notice the length. It's never once a boring or slow book, and there would be potential for that to happen with a less-skilled author.

Grimm Memorials tells us the story of the Nailer family who have just relocated to a small, woodsy town in Western Massachusettes from Boston. Dad's got a new job going, Mom's got a baby on the way, Jackie and Jen, the couple's young children are growing up fast...things are going well for the family. Until they cross paths with there twisted neighbor, Eleanor Grimm, a descendant of the Brothers Grimm and proprietor of Grimm Memorials, a mortuary and crematorium. She's a cannibalistic witch, on a quest for immortality with a taste for young children and powers to make her victims hallucinate in truly messed up ways. Along for the ride is her ghostly brother, vicious dog and a basement full of tortured kids...Are the Nailers going to end up the menu?

What do you think?

Originally published by Onyx Books in 1990, Grimm Memorials got republished in 2005 by Pinnacle, as a companion piece to the then-newly published Grimm Reapings, the sequel to this.

My copy is the reprint, whose cover art makes it look like a Lifetime Halloween special or something...don't be fooled by it...the book is ferocious.

Also, if anyone has an Onyx copy, I'd love to hear from you, because that's the art I want in my collection :)

Anyway!

Grimm Memorials is just about everything I could want in a book. It's fun, it's disgusting, it's sad sometimes. I can't think of a single complaint I have here.
Most of the violence in the book does take place against children, so I can see some being unnerved by that. Tread lightly, if that bothers you.

If I could give it a 5+, I would. A total 5/5, with my utmost recommendation. One of my favorite reads of all time, right here.